Saturday, February 4, 2012

just another witless title

hiding under the darkness of the bedcovers for fear that light would shove these damn icepicks further into my brain... couldn't even listen to music this morning.

there are at least two girls lurking in the shadows, ready, i hope, to begin sharing their stories. most of the years in and out of hospitals are a total blank to me. lots of the highlights are there but the emotion, the sense of having been there, i'm lacking. the more of these bits and pieces that come up and the more of these bits of emotion i feel, the more convinced i am this has a lot to do with my headache. all this stuff boiling beneath the surface and me, in my usual way, keeping it all bottled up and locked in, it's no surprise we have a migraine that won't quit.

see Lyn tomorrow. i think the EMDR is still a good idea if for no other reason than it may trigger the girls in the shadows to talk. if we can open verbal communication we can get somewhere.

we need to before the pain or the cutting begin taking their toll.

Charlie needs the computer again. he's been working from home today. i'm glad he's here but i need to be able to write in hopes of letting off some steam. the timing isn't the best.