Saturday, January 4, 2014

ok, so how are you *really*?

 8/22/2002

 in a word, shitty.

charlie's tired of the slug routine. who wouldn't be? but when he gets frustrated with the lack of constructive activity going on, and the fact that the kids trash the house and don't pick up after themselves, he tends to get a little cold. he doesn't intend to but hey, he's human right? he doesn't want to say 'look, make a decision and get what needs doing done.' because he knows how strong the 'can't do anything right' shit is right now.

tired of physically being in pain and it feels emotionally like we're just trying to keep it together enough to stay conscious of reality. if one of the three of us lets go, the dam will break and we'll just collapse into a puddle of goo.

yeah, there's a lot that needs to just be let out but it's hard not to try and put it off. it's not a fun thing to do and without therapy right now, there is no safe place to fall apart. at home there is always a child around who gets upset and confused when mommy cries.

so anyway... there's no real depth of writing right now because we're busy trying to keep the lid on. if we're a little slow in answering notes and stuff, please forgive us. we will check in with y'all soon as we can.