Tuesday, February 4, 2014

strange but no surprise

9/11/2002

i remember the shock and the horror. the vague sense that it could not possibly be real. the mind mumbling understanding that we were watching as thousands died. we watched as the rescue workers whose bodies would later be pulled from the wreckage, ran into those buildings to give their lives for others.

you know what my kids remember? it was the day they came home to mom crying inconsolably. strange that i remember every vision that met my eyes. watching live television as people jumped to their deaths to escape. odd that i remember every detail of that day... but the tears. it was the tears that made the depth of this real to the kids. they had seen me cry before, so i'm not certain what made it different for them. all i know is that my tears helped them see the grief this event caused a nation. they raised over $400 for the 9-11 fund. it was real to them more because of how i reacted than what they saw on the television. it touched their hearts because they could see and touch the grief they saw in me.

yet, i remember not a tear.

today i felt them fall.